I will never climb Mount Everest. Never. Never. I don’t even want to climb Mount Everest. It has never been on my bucket list. Living in the Pacific Northwest, however, I did love to hike. I loved to be at the top of a mountain to see the view. It was always worth the climb, but I didn’t like going back down. Not only because I doid’t want to let go of the exhilaration, I didn’t like the uncertain footing of the downward climb. If there is any incline at all… someone had better be ready to lend me a hand, or I need to prepare and bring my own walking stick.

My last post was the story of a man who doesn’t seem to be able to resist climbing every challenging peak in the world… .over and over again. He was inspiring.

He said something that has stuck with me. He told us to stick with your team – stay close to friends and family – they are your team!

“Alone we can do so little, together we can do so much.” -Helen Keller

As documented on this blog, I have survived my grief journey through the support and love of my friends and family and everyone who reads my words. This journey continues, but as I reflect on the need to stick with my team I recall an adventure from this past autumn. I wonder what adventure that you, my reader, have survived because you had the support of some really good friends?

This particular story begins at some time in late summer and actually intertwines with my grief journey. My dear friend Tammy invited me to join her and a few of her friends for a little kayaking adventure on Lake Powell. I didn’t commit because I didn’t know my schedule and was pretty sure that this wasn’t an adventure in which I would like to participate. It completely left my mind until about a week before they were scheduled to depart. I suddenly knew that I needed to be there and I actually wanted to be there. It seems that I have been given these types of promptings several times since Mark passed. I recognized it and asked Tammy if there was still room.

Yes, there was room, but just barely. Someone’s daughter had decided to drive later. Five of us old ladies would fit in the cab of a pickup truck for the drive down. We gathered an extra kayak and equipment. Here was the beginning of the team support… my friend invited me and then helped make arrangements to fit me in. Together we can do so much.

I was somewhat acquainted with two of the other ladies and had never met the third. Of course my preference would have been to drive my own car with Tammy, have great conversation along the way and meet them there. Nope. We packed up the truck and trailer, climbed into the truck and proceeded to have… guess what?? A great conversation! Just like that I had new friends. It would not have been the same on my own.

We stayed at an AirBNB. We had room assignments and cooking assignments and cleaning assignments. We celebrated someone’s birthday. We played games. We sat and enjoyed the warm evening on the patio. What would I have done on my own? Well, none of that because I would not have even been there. I would have been having another quiet weekend at home and to be truthful I like my quiet times alone. But to continue in truthfulness I also really like being out and having time with friends.

We had just one day to be on the lake. Our friend with the truck also knows how to tie down and maneuver a trailer. Her skills allowed me to have this adventure. We helped one another up and down the steep trail to the lake. It took two of us to carry the each of the kayaks and another trip to gather our food, etc. Teamwork made possible what we could not do on our own. Together we can do so much.

I have absolutely no kayaking experience. Once Mark and I shared a ride-on-top kayak and rowed around a calm lake at home in California. As we set off in our individual boats I was really wishing he was there with me. He had experience as well as muscles. When I was with him I had more confidence. Along the shore with us was a large group of tourists. We left before them but in no time at all they caught us and passed us with ease. They were mostly couples in double kayaks and it was obvious that having a man on board gave the boat quite an advantage.

My advantage that day was my group of friends. This stretch of open lake was a couple miles long and the water was rough. We had to hug the shore which was actually a cliff rising above our heads so you didn’t want to get too close. Speed boats and house boats were everywhere and their wake would bounce off this cliff giving us an even more wild ride. Those strong men in the “couple boats” had me discouraged for a bit, but looking around and seeing these five other ladies managing their way helped me on my way. I wasn’t the only newbie and we all called out advice to one another. We shared what was working for us or in what ways we could see someone else needed a little improvement in their form or paddling or whatever. Seeing that they could do this told me that I could do this. Together we can do so much!

We finally turned left into our canyon. The waters were calm now but moving forward continued to require effort. A couple of the ladies knew the way and their stories of the beauty that lay ahead was encouraging. It was fun to share these calm moments together. We could paddle near one another and share stories. Had I been paddling on my own I would have enjoyed the beauty but it was magnified by sharing.

It was September and the water was low. This meant that we “docked” our boats much further back into the lake than anticipated. We had to wade through deep, sludgy mud. It was so gross and smelly and there were bugs and on my own I would have just turned around to avoid dealing with it. Together we laughed at the struggle and we laughed as how disgusting it was and we helped each other out of the chaos and onto the shore. We climbed up to some rocks to eat our lunch. Eating with others is always better than eating alone.

Now it was time for a hike and this is more of my comfort zone, though I have never hiked for two miles in “water” shoes. How pleased I was to find that in this group were ladies who, like me, enjoyed stopping to look at the resilient flowers that were blooming in the desert. There was even another woman who, like me, wanted to take time to stop and just put her hands on the rocks. We all did these things and together we began to notice little points of interest in nature that we would have missed had we been with hikers who just wanted to plow through and get it over with. Likewise, I wouldn’t have known that we had these idiosyncrasies in common had we not been out adventuring together.

I mentioned that I don’t like to go downhill. These fears are greatly magnified when it includes sandstone. When we came to a rock that required a little climbing I was ready to turn around or at least just wait for them to return. They would not hear of it and with their help and coaching I made it up and even worse, made it back down on our return. On neither direction was it fun though I did feel a sense of accomplishment. I was also able to experience the beauty that was beyond the steep rock. I would have never, ever have done this without the encouragement and assistance of these wonderful ladies. Together we can do so much!

As we paddled back through the calm canyon we lamented the fact that we had not been able to swim. There were no beaches, but here we were on an absolutely perfect autumn day and we wanted to be in the water. We spotted a bit of a ledge that we thought might work… and we made it work. There wasn’t really a spot for a kayak, let alone six kayaks… but we figured it out. It was tricky to balance your boat and then stand up and get into and then again out of the water without slipping or tipping or otherwise hurting either yourself or your dignity. I would have never even attempted this on my own. Together we directed and helped each other and we were rewarded with a lovely swim. Since we were wearing life jackets we could relax in the water and chat and enjoy each other’s company. Sometimes it is just nice to relax together and not worry that you will soon have to go back out onto the rough waters.

Back to the rough waters. I had been secretly dreading this the whole day. Hiking and on calm waters we were able to break off and visit in pairs or as a group. We could even snack and share with each other. This didn’t work so well on the open lake. I didn’t feel alone because we were all there together, just more spread out. I knew I wasn’t alone in the struggle with the waves. About a mile from shore I decided that what I really wanted was to just be done. I was tired. I began to concentrate on my paddling, digging my oar deeper and deeper into the water. I was aware of my muscles and my movements and how much water I was displacing with each pull of the paddle. I worked to keep my kayak pointed straight toward my destination. What a surprise to look up and find that I had passed everyone and they were falling farther behind me. There was no sense of race or competition but it felt good to exert personal effort and I just plowed ahead. Eventually I got tired of it, but I kept going because it was getting me to my destination which is where I wanted to be.

I pulled my boat ashore and had some time to wait for the others. As each friend arrived we waited and cheered for those on their way. We were tired but the adventure wasn’t over. We now had to carry those heavy boats back up that steep mountain. Ugh. No one wanted to do it but it had to be faced. I was so happy to be with ladies who don’t complain. Maybe I complained… but we all helped each other. We wanted to rest but then had to load up the trailer. We arrived home but then had to cook dinner. We enjoyed dinner but then had to clean up. The pattern goes on and on doesn’t it? Together we can do so much – and so much needs to be done!

The next morning we worked together to clean the home and then attended church. It was nice to see everyone cleaned up in their Sunday best and worshiping together. On the drive home there was a deeper sense of friendship and trust. We shared personal stories of hardship and faith and overcoming. These women are strong – and not just because they can paddle a kayak. I came home inspired by them and with more confidence in myself. On my own I would have stayed home. If I had gone on my own I would not have had the skills to maneuver a trailer or the muscles to get the boat into or out of the water. The couples working together would have discouraged me. The wake coming from powerful boats and then reflecting off the cliffs would have overcome me. That disgusting mud would have overwhelmed me. The steep sandstone rock would have stopped me. I would have turned back more than once. I would not have come home with confidence and cherished memories and new friendships.

Kayaking on Lake Powell is just child’s play to many people. To me it was a challenge. What is your challenge? This entire adventure was absolutely beautiful. Stunning in fact. Just like life right? Absolutely beautiful but difficult and requiring effort and requiring one another. Don’t be afraid to accept invitations and step outside of your comfort zone.

For most of my life I paddled through my adventures with a strong and handsome companion. For now I paddle on my own, but not entirely on my own. I am forever grateful for the love and support of good friends (including family). If we were all there for one another – all there – what a wonderful world this would be.

Alone we can do so little. Together we can do so much.