Yes. I guess most people would say that we are crazy…

In the middle of a battle with cancer we are moving forward with a major home remodel. Many friends know the story – but this time through perhaps you will notice the tender mercies.

When we planned our move to Utah it was with the intention of building a home. We found a piece of property in our little town but the deal fell through. In the meantime we had fallen in love with the area and felt pretty strongly about settling here. Seriously the only reason we were moving to Utah was because we felt drawn to this town. I remembered that months before I had taken a photo of a property with a for-sale-by-owner sign. We were had been so bummed when our first deal didn’t work out, but we liked the for sale-by-owner property so much more. Surely it would be gone by then… but surprise! It wasn’t. Mark called the seller and as they talked she decided to offer him the adjoining lot with the existing home. Initially he said no but within an hour or two we decided to call back and get more information.

At this time I was flying from Texas to Utah on a somewhat regular basis to be with my child going through chemotherapy. We made an appointment to see the home on a Saturday, but as I was sitting in a crowded terminal in Dallas I had the impression to call the owner and see if I could look at the house after landing (it was a Thursday). I didn’t want to call because they were already boarding the plane and it was noisy, but I felt that this was important so I made the arrangements. When I walked into the house it felt like I had come home. As the owner toured me through she received a phone call which she looked at and silenced. She later told me that it was the one other family to whom she had offered the home. They were calling to make an offer but she liked me better. I did make on offer that weekend and we were in business.

We owned the home for a couple years before moving and my parents worked hard during this time to come over and clean up the yard. When we moved to Utah we rented a home nearby so that we could do a little more updating. Throughout the entire process we knew a major remodel was in store but the longer we lived in the home the more we realized that it was going to need more and more attention. We made the decision to build a new home adjacent to this one and then tear it down. We went through quite a process to design our new home – we had to fire a designer and then we found someone we loved working with but it was during my illness so meetings were few and far between. We finally had plans drawn up and engineered but… small town policies and politics put up all sorts of roadblocks. After many months we determined to count it all sunk costs and just remodel on the existing footprint, an idea we had fought against for three years.

So there you have it – once again something that we thought was just awful and a setback turned out to be better than what we had before. The new houseplans suit us well and though we miss several of the features we gave up, we have added several that we like better. Right now the plans are in engineering and we are praying that the building inspector will approve the remodel!

Here’s the thing – we had only one meeting to work on the new design before Mark’s tumor made it too painful for him to be involved. Our builder asked if we still wanted to proceed. Yes! Both of us wanted to move forward. So the designer and I began the fun process of designing a home via email. During this time we were staying at the Hope Lodge so people said we were crazy to take on a project – but it gave me a great distraction and something to think about and plan. Usually the designer would email a set of plans which I would print out. Then I would cut and paste my ideas using scissors and scotch tape. Very fun! For those who don’t know – the Hope Lodge is located in The Avenues which is a part of Salt Lake City full of fun old houses. I would take walks and take photos of features that I liked. Slowing down and having the extra time gave us time to figure out what we really wanted.

Here’s another thing. This second plan meant moving out of our home for quite awhile. Some time ago I realized that we needed to do our part to be ready. We rented a freight container and began to pack up our house and transfer items there. Eventually it was time to find a rental home. There are not a lot of options close by and we really didn’t want a townhome. When I first looked there seemed to be four possible homes in the neighboring town and I was getting nervous as each one of them turned out to be already taken. The remaining home seemed to be available but it was almost impossible to find a human for information. Eventually it worked out and we began to slowly move things from one house to another. Slowly because it was me moving bags and boxes as I found the time. When there was heavy lifting there were always plenty of volunteers with trucks and trailers. We are surrounded by good people.

I got sidetracked… I wanted to point out that the rental home is exactly what we needed. It is a single level – rare around here. There is an unfinished basement for more storage and it has an outside door which has made moving so much easier. It is just fifteen minutes from our home. It backs up to a hill with empty lots so we have a semblance of privacy… we are just used to living on acreage with a little more space between the neighbors. It is a starter home, but it is just what we need. I am grateful every day.

Another thing that has been great about all of our setbacks and delays – we have lived through several seasons, we’ve seen lot of weather and experienced oh-so-many bugs… and this has helped us make adjustments on our plans…

…Well – I just came back to my typing after quite some time and I am wondering what is the point of the story?

First of all to let everyone know that yes, we are crazy and taking on a huge house project right in the middle of a huge cancer project. Yet we are having fun working on it together, so maybe we are not so crazy after all.

Second, we have learned a lot about patience and more importantly, when things are not going the way you planned just wait, try something new and see how it all turns out. It will often be for the better.

Updates:

1. Jackie’s brain tumor has not changed at all. The doctor compared four years of MRIs and it is completely stable. He will continue to observe it annually, but he is now thinking it may not be a neoplasm at all. Great news! If she should need surgery in the future, he said that the location is ideal and side effects would be few.
2. Mark is struggling with GI issues which began before the chemo and the doctors are perplexed. They have tried medications and he had a CT of his abdomen this afternoon to see if this could provide a clue. My favorite explanation is that this is a side effect of the immunotherapy. There are a few other explanations which are not too popular with me, but for now we are still waiting to find out.
3. A day later – it would appear that the immunotherapy is indeed the cause of the trouble. He will stay another day or two in the hospital while they get it under control.
4. I just thought of this – Sunday is Mark’s birthday. If you have a way to send him birthday greetings, please do. This week has been rather difficult.

Just for fun – here are a few pictures of some of the initial work done on the house the past few years: